MORNING SUGAR: 102
BOWEL MOVEMENT (s): 1 morning poo (see homework details below). Oh, and then a second poo (mostly anxiety-based, I believe), about half an hour before I needed to walk out the door for my day long excursions.
BREAKFAST: 2 cups of coffee, with half-n-half and a total of 4 Splendas. 1 banana. 2 pieces of peanut butter/cinnamon toast.
LUNCH: (Actually something of a second breakfast, as I met friends for a late brekky). Scrambled eggs, 4 pieces of bacon, 1 piece of sourdough toast and a cup of mixed fruit. Water to drink.
DINNER: Turkey and Swiss cheese sandwich,with light Miracle Whip. Two handfuls of SunChips. 2 of the Belvita breakfast biscuits for dessert (that's all of them -- no more!). 1 diet root beer.
SNACKS: 1 regular-sized bag of M&Ms. 1 plain toasted bagel with cream cheese. Late evening snack: 1 banana and a handful of those -- crunchy salted peas? Not sure the technical "snack" term for these, but they're good! An afternoon cup of coffee (courtesy of my psychiatrist -- thanks Dr. Mike).
EXERCISE: No hike or full weights workout today. But: Full body stretch. 110 push-ups. 400 ab crunches / sit-ups.
TOTAL NO. OF STEPS: Just over 8k.
WRITING: This blog. With plenty of activities out of the house today, and evening setting in upon my return -- nothing got done, on any writing projects. Sigh. Surprisingly though, I'm not totally beating myself up for it. That's a tiny miracle worth mentioning!
THERAPY HOMEWORK: Just under 10 minutes from first strong poo urge, to finally giving up and heading to the commode. Not my finest hour on this particular therapeutic exercise.
SOCIAL OUTINGS: 10am breakfast with a filmmaker I've only "met" online. Was him and his filmmaker friend, so we had a wonderful time talking shop, talking movies and just generally getting to know one another. And since the time with them was so great, it's just another case of the anxiety being about getting there (the logistics - parking, traffic, bathroom accessibility, etc.), not the enjoyment and socializing of the actual event.
MEDITATIVE WRITING: My day out of the house was long, so got home early evening. No meditative writing today. And it HURTS me that this didn't happen.
READING: Started reading the conclusion of my latest Lovecraft story, but it wasn't clicking. The print was too small. My eyes were tired, etc.
HOUSEHOLD CHORES / PROJECTS: Grocery shopping. Filled up the car with gas.
OTHER / MISC.: Had my weekly session with my psychiatrist.
DID I MAKE THE BED? Yes.
DID I POOP MY PANTS? Nope. Not even a little bit. ;)
Was a pretty hearty day as far as anxiety. I left the house at 9am, got gas, then drove to North Hollywood for a breakfast I was eagerly anticipating. But of course, not knowing the area super well, and having to look for parking and meeting these folks for the first time (the list goes on and on and on) -- I was anxious. In fact, there was some legit poo anxiety after my second poo of the morning (see above). I was worried about that, and feeling "rumbly". Once I filled the car with gas, and got on the 101, I began to relax. Great breakfast, but then had to get back on the 101 to the 405 (I NEVER drive those if I don't have to), to go to my appointment at the VA. Traffic was pretty heavy, and I'd just had a substantial breakfast. But surprisingly, while my tummy gurgled a bit (normal digestion, folks -- but any rumble could lead to potential disaster, at least in my head), I arrived at the VA safe and sound -- but more importantly, poopy-pants free!
And as part of my exposure therapy, my psychiatrist bought me a coffee -- which he knows can sometimes do a number on my bowels -- and we had our session outside, walking around the VA campus -- with no bathroom immediately handy, should the need arise.
I left my appointment, with a little anxiety about the recently-consumed coffee, but ended up being mostly relaxed on the drive home -- so much so, that I even stopped to do a little shopping at the grocery store!
New therapy homework for the coming week, until my next appointment. Definitely some challenges, but we'll see where this "poop therapy" continues to go. Stay tuned! :)
Was a pretty hearty day as far as anxiety. I left the house at 9am, got gas, then drove to North Hollywood for a breakfast I was eagerly anticipating. But of course, not knowing the area super well, and having to look for parking and meeting these folks for the first time (the list goes on and on and on) -- I was anxious. In fact, there was some legit poo anxiety after my second poo of the morning (see above). I was worried about that, and feeling "rumbly". Once I filled the car with gas, and got on the 101, I began to relax. Great breakfast, but then had to get back on the 101 to the 405 (I NEVER drive those if I don't have to), to go to my appointment at the VA. Traffic was pretty heavy, and I'd just had a substantial breakfast. But surprisingly, while my tummy gurgled a bit (normal digestion, folks -- but any rumble could lead to potential disaster, at least in my head), I arrived at the VA safe and sound -- but more importantly, poopy-pants free!
And as part of my exposure therapy, my psychiatrist bought me a coffee -- which he knows can sometimes do a number on my bowels -- and we had our session outside, walking around the VA campus -- with no bathroom immediately handy, should the need arise.
I left my appointment, with a little anxiety about the recently-consumed coffee, but ended up being mostly relaxed on the drive home -- so much so, that I even stopped to do a little shopping at the grocery store!
New therapy homework for the coming week, until my next appointment. Definitely some challenges, but we'll see where this "poop therapy" continues to go. Stay tuned! :)
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